Being in a relationship is great. Knowing that there is someone out there who loves you to bits is enough to turn your worst day into a great one. However, the fun, the excitement and the feeling of love are just one side of a relationship, because arguments, disagreements and fights are something all couples have to deal with as well. Knowing how to go through every aspect of a relationship, the good times and the bad, with your partner, is the surest ways of making a relationship stand the test of time.
Both men and women are responsible for their relationship since they are both equal parties in it. However, many men claim that there are mistakes that women make that leave them with no option but to call it quits, whether that means breaking up or cheating. It’s important to state that there is never any circumstance when cheating is acceptable, regardless of how tough it is being in that relationship. For your sake, and the sake of anyone else involved, come out clean by deciding who you want to be with and standing by your decision.
The following are 10 things that will make it impossible for a woman to keep a good man. A woman who does these things regularly is bound to be single for a long time. If there are things here that you think affect you, or that your man sees in you, try and change as soon as possible.
10. Not Recognizing Your Worth
You are special, you are talented, you are beautiful, you have a great personality, you are great to be around, and you are on your way to achieving your wildest dreams; yes that’s you, and don’t you ever forget that. A woman who knows what she is worth will never go for a man who does not deserve her. Women with no sense of self-worth will always be single because the men they let into their lives are only there to destroy them as opposed to building them up to be the women they were meant to be. A woman who knows her worth stands out even when she is in a crowd, and such a woman is sure to attract the attention of a worthy gentleman. However, someone who is open for ‘anything’ will spend her life hopping from one ‘anything’ to the next.
9. Choosing Money Over Character
This is another can of worms that I just had to open because many women out there make this mistake over and over again. Money is a wonderful thing to have, especially in plenty, and it is actually great to go for a man who can afford the finer things in life. However, women make the mistake of going for rich jerks when the option of a man of character who is not so well off is available for them. It’s extremely hard for a rich man with no respect for who you are to develop respect with time; it will only get worse. A humble man of character who truly loves you will one day become rich, and chances of such a man treating you badly are very slim because you were right next to him throughout his journey.
8. Complaining Too Much
No one likes people who constantly complain about everything, so do not expect your man to take it in and keep treating you like the queen you are when all you do is whine. There are some men who are extremely annoying and they hardly do anything the way any educated human being out there should; such men need professional help. However, if your man is really trying to improve, and whatever you are complaining about is not that important, try complimenting him instead. Choosing to focus on the things he is actually doing right and praising him on a daily basis for even the little things will keep both of you happy for a very long time. Furthermore, when he discovers the results of doing well, he will change those things that are bugging you to keep the praise coming.
7. Comparing Him With Other Men
Men are naturally competitive and no man wants to come in second, regardless of how pointless the competition is. Men do not like to feel as if their woman is comparing them to other men, unless the woman is pointing out just how awesome he is. Comparing a man to your ex in a way that makes him feel belittled will only chase him away or make him give up on trying to impress you. The comparison might always happen in your mind, but never let your thoughts get to your lips or cause you to act differently. Think about it, you would not like to be compared with other women in your area of weakness, would you?
6. Expecting the Worst – Stereotyping
Stereotyping is everywhere, especially when it comes to men. It is possible to point out all the bad things men and women do, forgetting that those bad things are done by individuals and not the whole gender. A woman in a relationship should always remind herself that not all men are jerks; her man might be different. When you expect the worst from your man, more often than not he will prove you right. On the other hand, when you expect the best from your man, though you might get disappointed from time to time, he will eventually meet your expectations. Don’t judge your man without any evidence, and where there is evidence, make sure to be patient and understanding when carrying out the sentence.
5. Acting Like the Queen – All the Time
If you are in a relationship with a man who does not treat you like the queen you are, then you are probably with the wrong man. However, him treating you like a queen and you acting like a queen are two different things. Don’t expect him to be your slave, to be the one doing everything for you while you just sit on your throne giving orders. Since you are his queen, don’t forget that in the same understanding, he automatically becomes your king. A relationship is always give and take, he will treat you with all the love, care and concern fit for a queen, if you also take time to love and respect him like a king.
4. Never Submitting
What is your interpretation of the word “submit” in a relationship? The dictionary describes submitting as “accepting or yielding to someone else’s authority, will, or superiority,” a definition that many people in relationships interpret in the wrong way. Submitting to your man does not mean that you have no say in the relationship or that he is the master and you are the slave, submitting means that once in a while you should choose the high road and let him decide to do things his way. A decent man will value a woman who knows when to give in, and in no time the man will start to submit to the woman’s wishes as well. If you never submit, you will either remain single all your life or never be happy in your relationship.
3. Forgetting Just How Different Men And Women Are
Men and women might be the same species in the animal kingdom, but their differences are so pronounced that at times it’s hard to find any similarity. A man thinks, talks, acts, responds, and reacts very differently from a woman, even in the simplest of things. The difference between a man and a woman is not a question of intelligence, strength, or superiority of one gender; rather, the difference is there to help men and women complement each other. Expecting your man to know what you are thinking without telling him exactly what you are thinking is a bit ambitious. If you do not realize early enough how different he is from you, you are in for numerous frustrating relationships. Do not drive a perfectly good man away because you want him to be like one of the girls, that’s why you have girlfriends.
2. Trying to Change Him
Trying to change someone is not only one of the worst things you can attempt in a relationship, but it is more often than not futile. When a woman tries to change a man into what she wants him to be, the man will not only look for the fastest way out of that relationship, but will resent her for the rest of his life. It’s possible to influence a man to become better at some things and to stop doing other things, but let him make that decision for himself. However, if you cannot stand him the way he is, then he was probably not made for you. There is a woman out there who can stand him just as he is, and there is a man out there for you as well.
1. Not Understanding What Love Is
Love is really what holds a relationship together, and when either party in a relationship does not have a clear understanding of what love is all about, he or she will be frustrated. Love is not just saying the words or expecting your significant other to be thinking about you all the time, love is much more than that. When a woman understands that love is more of an action than it is a feeling, no man will ever want to let her go. Since actions speak much louder than words, try to love your man by being patient, kind, forgiving, encouraging, tolerant, selfless and faithful. The results will blow your mind.