Being a nerd is a lot cooler than it used to be. As time has gone by nerds have gained a lot more credibility than they had in days gone by. Being smart and being a geek is not nearly as damaging as it used to be to one’s reputation and social life. One could almost say that nerds are cool. Sometimes anyway.
Still, though, there are some things that will simply never be cool, not ever. While you might be able to get away with being all into Star Wars around a hot chick, no woman has ever thought it was cool to go out with a guy that was into Minecraft. And when you are hanging around the break room at work, it is still never a good idea to talk about how your Druid just leveled up and you are nervous about facing your first dungeon.
So, to help you figure out what you can get away with as a nerd, we at TheRichest put together this handy list. It’s fine if you like doing these things of course; one should always be themselves. But as far as being cool goes, if you are into these things you might as well give it up. Because these are the top 15 Nerdiest Things That Will Never be Cool.
Well, this is a good one to start with. Rollerblading has never, ever, been cool – not even a little bit. Back in the day it was pretty popular, but even then it was not even a little bit cool. Nowadays if you rollerblade you might as well be wearing an enormous sign on your back that says “nerd.” While women just look dorky, and maybe even a little cute while rollerblading, a guy just looks straight up ridiculous. There is literally no way to be cool while rollerblading.
14. Star Trek
Star Trek itself is kind of cool. Not really, but kind of, in a retro way. The TV show was pretty hilarious, and the movies were not totally awful. But while Star Wars fans can possibly be cool, not so with Star Trek. Being into Star Trek to the point that you dress up like the characters from the show, go to conventions, or speak Klingon, is so uncool that it is totally off the charts. Again, no judging here, go ahead and do you all that you want, but the whole Trekkie thing is never going to be cool.
Sure some guys think girls that dress in Cosplay costumes are hot, and sure some of them actually are. But they are only hot because they are playing into the nerd fantasy. And a guy that dresses up in Cosplay costumes? Just don’t. I know that when you stood in front of the mirror dressed as your favorite character you thought you looked cool, but to the rest of the world you look silly at best, and totally pathetic at worst. Which is fine if you are just trying to let your nerd flag fly. But not cool.
12. Collecting Comic Books
Comic books sure are cool. When you’re twelve. After that, things become a little odd when dealing with a grown man that is all into comic books. Sure the art can be cool, and yeah, sometimes the storylines are okay, but the reality of the situation is that comic books are for boys and not men. There, I said it. So, if you want to collect comic books and get all into them that is totally fine, but just know that in the eyes of most people there is not a much bigger sign of a nerd than the whole comic book thing.
11. Playing MMOs
If you are blowing off social engagements because you need to go raid with your guild, or you called in sick to work because you needed to do some more dungeons to get some good gear then you might just possibly be a nerd. World of Warcraft, and other MMOs are games that often can quickly become more important than real life to the people that are playing them. Nothing says nerd more than spending all night worrying whether your guild leader is mad at you because of your low DPS.
10. Being Good at Math
We get it. You are really smart, and you will probably end up making a ton of money because of it. Still, we don’t care. Why don’t we care? Because being really into math is about as boring and nerdy as anything we can think of. It’s fine if you are good at math. No problem there, but that doesn’t mean you have to be all into it. Please, for the love of God stop talking about math. There might be something cool about being good at it, but keep it to yourself, the rest of us don’t care.
How did anime ever even get remotely popular? And why are there men who are actually into it? The whole thing just screams nerd, and in the loudest way possible. If you can’t or won’t stop, please at least have the decency to recognize that the rest of us all think you are totally lame for liking it. The words “cool’ and “anime” should never be said in the same sentence.
8. Conspiracy Theories
There are some conspiracy theories that are true of course. They aren’t all made up. But that isn’t really what we mean by this. It is fine to have your own theories about things. But if you are the guy at the party that keeps talking about how the moon landing was fake, or that 9-11 was an inside job, just stop. No one wants to hear it, and as much as you think being “different” makes you cool, the reality is that everyone just really wants you to shut up.
This should kind of go without saying, but we are going to say it anyway. Puppets are not cool. They really are not cool in any way, shape or form. Which is fine, if you want to get your puppet on, but don’t think it doesn’t make you a total nerd. Now, if you work for Sesame Street or something like that you can get some sort of a pass, but not much. Puppets have long been avoided by anyone with a little bit of cool, and we don’t see that changing any time soon.
6. Fanny Packs
If you are a guy and you are even thinking of wearing a fanny pack, please, just stop right now. The coolest guy in the world can’t get away with it. As in, “Wait, is that Brad Pitt wearing a fanny pack? Nerd.” And as far as I know none of you guys are Brad Pitt. The whole thing is just ridiculous. If it is too big for your wallet and too small for your backpack just do us all a favor and leave it at home. In fact, don’t just do us a favor, do yourself one as well. Fanny packs will never be cool.
5. Collecting Action Figures
Man, collecting action figures is fun! When you’re eight years old. If you are an adult and you collect them, well then it is pretty much the same thing as playing with dolls. Now just like comic books, some action figures can make you some serious coin if you sell them later down the road, and money is always cool. But if you are just doing this for the sheer enjoyment of looking at the Hulk on your dresser – you just hit a 10 on the nerd scale.
4. Creating Maps of Fictional Places
We get it. You really liked the book you just read, and you really love Game of Thrones. It was like you really were there, you got so into it. But for God’s sake, don’t spend days, weeks, or months making a perfect map of the imaginary land that existed in the book that you just read. Or by all means do, but if you do, know that you are getting really high up there on the nerd scale. I know it would be wonderful if you lived within this imaginary world, but the reality is that your alarm went off and it is time to go to work and you aren’t an epic adventurer after all.
3. Dungeons and Dragons
At this point in the list we are truly getting up there for things that are too nerdy to ever be cool, and any list of this nature needs Dungeons and Dragons. For those of you that don’t know, D & D is a board game in which groups of nerds gather weekly or even more often to create characters and live in a fantasy world together. This type of gathering is almost guaranteed to not have anyone cool at it ever. Which, of course, is cool with the nerds. A secret fact is that nerds like cool people even less than cool people like nerds.
2. Fan Fiction
Fan fiction is truly horrible. For those not in the know, fan fiction is basically when some random nobody chooses to write some really horrible story involving a character that is not sanctioned by the real author. So in other words, some total nerd will write a story about how Harry Potter got into a fist fight with a dinosaur, post it somewhere, then all sorts of other nerds read it and tell the author how great it was. Fan Fiction is so uncool it seems like nothing could ever be nerdier except…
In a world full of nerds, nothing, and I mean nothing, is nerdier than Larping. For those not in the know, LARP stands for “Live Action Role Playing” and yes, it is just as horrifying as it sounds. People get in costumes, and go to a park or something and attempt to act out some sort of adventure. If you’ve ever seen real life Larping, it is so incredibly nerdy that it is hard to watch without physically cringing. It is safe to say that Larping will never, ever be cool.