When it comes to dating and relationships, one of the most interesting topics for discussion is turn-offs. They differ to some extent from men to women, but some are pretty universal.
For women, most turn-offs have to do with personality, and include a lack of manners, hygiene problems, being boring overall, having a cocky attitude, being condescending and so on. This list could go on forever. For men, turn-offs generally include not showing up naked and not bringing beer. That’s a joke of course, and men ideally want a woman who doesn’t bring most of the above traits to the table.
Another universal turn-off is bad teeth. Whether they are discolored, missing, chipped, crowded, spaced out or just all over the place, most people, male or female, would prefer to find someone who has a decent situation in their mouth. It can be expensive, as dentists and orthodontists don’t work for cheap, but with good habits, including brushing, flossing and diligently visiting those costly professionals, an aesthetically pleasing smile isn’t that hard to come by. Here are twenty unfortunate celebrities who did not get the memo.
Note that some of these famous people have had dental surgery, but for our purposes we’ll focus on the “before” pictures.
Alright, while a few of these celebrities we will list are completely insufferable and we could care less about their feelings; this is not the case with Seal. He’s a talented singer-songwriter and based on his public persona, he’s a decent guy. His ex-wife Heidi Klum, also seems to have no problem with him despite their divorce.
One of the first things people notice about Seal is his face. He has very noticeable scars all over his face; a result of discoid lupus erythematosus. Unfortunately, along with the scars, he has a set of teeth that are all over the place, somewhat misshapen, not to mention the gap between his two upper front teeth. But we have to admit, the two women he has had publicized relationships with, Erica Packer and of course Heidi Klum, are both gorgeous models. Like comedian Eddie Murphy said decades ago, you don’t even need to look good if you can sing. He said a lot of other words too, but none were polite or can be published.
19. Alexander Ovechkin
The first of a couple of athletes on our list, Alexander Ovechkin is one of those guys who has a case of hockey player teeth. These are also known colloquially as “summer teeth” (some’r here, some’r there). He’s one of the NHL’s best goal scorers (of the past decades) and while some guys rely on finesse alone to put the pick in the net, Ovie plays an aggressive game, throws hits and isn’t afraid to go anywhere. He can’t play defense to save his life, but that’s another story.
His ruthless play has paid off however, in the form of a few lost and crooked teeth, a net worth of over $100 million and a list of gorgeous ex-girlfriends that include models, a tennis player (Maria Kirilenko) and of course a fiancee, whose name is Nastya, but does not mean “nasty” in any way. While Ovie isn’t the worst case of hockey teeth (look up Mike Ricci, Bobby Clarke and Duncan Keith for better examples), the Russian goal-scorer is one of the best known players in the world right now, with significant actual celebrity status.
18. John Lydon
British musician John Lydon, who most people know as Johnny Rotten of the early punk band the Sex Pistols, is a musical icon in Britain and around the world for his contributions to music and counterculture. Despite his anti-establishment music and general attitude, he’s actually made some fairly pro-monarchy comments, especially about the Queen, so you’ll just have to figure that one out for yourself, because we can’t.
Lydon’s rebellious attitude may have also caused him to act out against oral hygiene as he has a missing tooth, while most of the ones that are still in there are discolored and a few are chipped. Too bad the band wasn’t called the “Sex Toothbrushes” or the “Floss Pistols”. Neither of those have the same ring, though.
17. Amy Winehouse
Now deceased for about five years, Amy Winehouse was a rare and unique treasure in the music business. Dying back in 2011, at just age 27, she was taken far too young. She had a long and complicated history of drug and alcohol abuse. From heroin and blow to booze and various pills, apparently there wasn’t much Amy Winehouse wouldn’t put in her body. That ended up being her downfall, as she died of a massive case of alcohol poisoning (her BAC was over .400%, which is enough to take down most NFL linemen). Related to the drug and alcohol use was a lifetime of suffering from various mental illnesses, such as bulimia, depression, and bipolar disorder.
16. Michael Sam
Our list’s second athlete, Michael Sam had a very memorable but brief professional football career. Let us be clear, his football career was not memorable for what he did on the field (next to nothing), his career was memorable because he came out of the closet before the 2014 draft and the media collectively wet themselves with excitement.
The defensive end had a cool summer job back in 2014, being signed to two NFL practice squads; the St. Louis (now L.A. Rams) and Dallas Cowboys. He then went to the Canadian Football League’s Montreal Allouettes, failed to record a tackle there and left the team before the end of the 2015 season.
He’s made all sorts of excuses for his lack of success in pro football, but most of his coaches have commented that he has a bad attitude and a skill set that does not stack up to NFL standards. His teeth don’t stack up to standards either; his got a nasty situation on his lower jaw that has caused a gnarly overbite.
15. Gary Busey
There is no shortage of eccentric, weird people in show business, and by far the most interesting, confusing, enigmatic person on this list is Gary Busey. He has the reputation for unusual and unprovoked outbursts these days. He has an impressive acting resume however, spanning since the late 1960s. While many young people only know him as “that crazy guy”, he’s actually a talented actor, and earned tons of respect for his great performance as the titular character in The Buddy Holly Story.
His personality took a fairly significant turn back in the late 1980s after a serious motorcycle accident. He sustained brain damage but it just seems to have made him more awesome. Other than his personality quirks, Busey is known for his teeth, which are fake and massive. He didn’t have great teeth previously, but after getting his fake ones, they look like they are far too big for his head, giving new meaning to the term “horse-grin”.
14. Clint Howard
The younger brother of Ron Howard, who was on The Andy Griffith Show and played Richie Cunningham on Happy Days, is Clint, one of those very minor Hollywood names who has made a career for himself by being a little funny looking. More often than not he plays a nobody or a total creep and it works for him. He has a definite case of crazy-guy eyes, an oddly shaped face, and a set of teeth that are all over the place.
He’s had more roles in both television and film than one can easily count (hundreds of roles), and is a well liked person within the industry. Despite all these roles, he’s still not a well known name, but a well known face, and those who do know him, often just remember him as “Ron Howard’s brother”. He’s got talent, and there is no question about that, but he’s seldom played large roles. He was in all three Austin Powers films, along with playing one of the Mud Dogs fans in Adam Sandler’s The Waterboy.
13. Jeremy Clarkson
Stereotypes may not be a pretty topic, but they certainly make it easier to make judgments about people without having to get to know them. A common stereotype about British people is that they have bad teeth. It’s a complete generalization, and anywhere in the world you look you’ll encounter people with terrible dental situations. With that said, Jeremy Clarkson has a bad case of what someone may call English teeth. Discolored, out of place and unusually large, are just a few words one could use to describe the spikes in his mouth.
The former Top Gear host is, regardless of his teeth, one of the most charismatic presenters on television, and despite his controversial dismissal from that program, he, Richard Hammond and James May, already have a new project, The Grand Tour, which looks like a promising, entertaining series on Amazon Video.
12. Woody Harrelson
American actor and noted cannabis enthusiast Woody Harrelson‘s impressive career goes back over thirty years, but his first memorable role was as Woody the bartender in the classic sitcom Cheers. He received a few Emmy nominations and one win for that role, and has been nominated for two Academy Awards for 1996’s The People VS Larry Flynt and 2009’s The Messenger. His recent work has seen him play drunken mentor Haymitch Abernathy in The Hunger Games movies and two years ago he teamed up with Matthew McConaughey for the first season of True Detective.
Despite all his success, he is known as a decent looking guy, but the last few years have not been so nice to his teeth. He has a couple of chips up front, not to mention the gap between the front two and some discoloring. Nonetheless, when he plays tough guy roles (which has been a good portion of his career), the look completely works for him.
11. Kirsten Dunst
Kirsten Dunst has been in show business for about 25 years, having started at just age six back in 1988. She is known for being a blue-eyed, blonde haired cute girl who has a unique smile. Two of her top lateral incisors are crooked and stick out a bit. It’s not very noticeable and certainly hasn’t hurt her career (steady work since the 1990s and worth about $25 million).
Throughout her time on the big screen, she has been told a few times to fix her smile, including on the set of Spiderman. Her mother also gave her that advice. She has said however, that it was Sofia Coppola who told her to never change her teeth. When asked about it, she has said “I love my snaggle-fangs. They give me character and character is sexy. People comment, but the only person who ever told me to fix them was my mom…. I just went my own way, like daughters do.”
10. Steve Buscemi
To say that actor Steve Buscemi has a unique look is a massive understatement along the lines of “Joseph Stalin didn’t really care about people”. Between eyes that look old and withered, and teeth that are all over the place, he’s a talented actor but not a great looking guy. Don’t get us wrong, his career has had some amazing roles, including Reservoir Dogs, Fargo and of course The Big Lebowski, but nobody is watching these movies to check out his sexy face.
We feel bad for saying it however, because the man is a hero. A little known fact about Steve Buscemi is that he was a firefighter before his acting career took off. After the September 11th terrorist attack, he returned to his old battalion and helped look for survivors in the wreckage. He’s been active advocating for New York firefighters for years now as well.
9. Vanessa Paradis
French actress, model and musical act Vanessa Paradis, is in the news these days defending her ex-husband Johnny Depp from the accusations of his now-ex Amber Heard. Paradis is essentially claiming that Depp is a good guy, does no harm to his partners and is being unfairly smeared by Heard and the media.
While she was one of the biggest names in the modeling business for a few years, her beauty is an acquired taste. Sure she’s thin and has a rockin’ figure, but her teeth can make her face difficult to look at. There is some discoloring and the gap in the middle may work for Madonna (I don’t think it does, but her fans seem to think the look works for her) but not for Paradis.
8. Mike Tyson
One of the greatest boxers of all time, “Iron” Mike Tyson is one of the most unintentionally funny show business personalities these days, from his memorable quotes such as wanting to eat Lennox Lewis’ children, the ear-biting incident against Evander Holyfield and his overall volatile personality.
Standing at just 5’10 with a comparatively short reach (just under 71 inches), his multiple world championship belts held in the late 1980s stand as a testament to his pure talent, and technique, especially his ability to get inside the range of taller boxers with better wingspan.
After years of being hit in the face, it isn’t scars and broken bones that have effected Tyson’s looks. Rather it is that weird tattoo and the fact that he had rough teeth to begin with, that have gotten worse over the years. Years of drug abuse didn’t help either. Regardless of the cause, he has a couple of chipped teeth, a gap in front and a prominent tooth one missing.
7. Ricky Gervais
Remember what I said several entries ago about Jeremy Clarkson of Top Gear? Well, you can repeat most of my comments about “British teeth” being an unfair stereotype but actually working in this situation. Ricky Gervais is an English comedian and is one of the meanest in the business. With that in mind, while I feel somewhat bad commenting on other celebrities’ imperfections, I feel nothing ripping into Gervais. He’s a prick and I imagine he’d be delighted to hear that I think so.
He is the comedic mastermind behind the original TV series The Office, the British one that spawned similar shows in other countries. But moving onto the reason you’re reading, Gervais has a nasty mouthful of “pearly once-were whites”, and they all seem to be out of order. He looks like he may have been a werewolf at some point in his life with fangs like that.
6. Nicole Ray
A few years ago, Nicole Ray was one of the hottest young names in the wonderful world of dirty movies. While most starlets in that business spend thousands maintaining perfect teeth, get augmentations here and there, and so on, Nicole Ray was a natural beauty. Around 2012, she all but disappeared from the business and nobody has been able to locate her in years. A lot of girls who get into that business try to fall off the face of the Earth after they end their careers.
While she had most of the assets that girls need to make names for themselves in the world of adult films, including cute eyes, a fit body and of course, a “sure, let’s do this” attitude, she did not have a great set of teeth. She probably could have gotten braces, which would have won her thousands of particularly creepy fans who are into the whole “really young girl” look.
5. Morgan Freeman
Morgan Freeman has had dental surgery in the past few years so his teeth actually look pretty good these days. At almost 80 years old, he actually looks pretty good overall and still has that magical voice. From early gems such as Glory and Shawshank Redemption to more recent films such as The Bucket List, Olympus Has Fallen and London Has Fallen, Freeman has one of the most impressive careers in the history of film.
Prior to a couple of years ago when he had significant dental surgery to fix his issues, Morgan Freeman’s teeth were in a rough state. Aside from his teeth being discolored, he also had a great deal of crowding in his top teeth and canines that looked like they were about to fall out altogether.
4. Anna Paquin
If you never saw her mouth, Anna Paquin might be one of the cutest women in show business. She’s pretty good looking all things considered. The former child star is probably best known for playing Rogue in the X-Men movies and for playing Sookie on the hit HBO series True Blood. She’s a half decent actress and there really aren’t any serious problems with her work. With that said, she has a gnarly set of teeth. Even when her mouth is closed you can tell there is something not quite right. Aside from the gap, which is obvious and as we’ve made clear, not the greatest look out there, it looks like her two front teeth are mismatched from the rest of her set, and have grown out too much.
From the dictionary of things that made the 1990s kind of unpleasant, here is singer-songwriter Jewel! To be fair to her, men aren’t really her target audience so I may not be the one to talk to about her talent. Regardless of the music she created and the albums sold (over 25 million; not too shabby) she is gorgeous, sporting a nice body, cute eyes and a nice smile, unless she’s showing teeth.
To her credit, much like Kirsten Dunst, she doesn’t care much for what the haters want to say. She’s defended her choice to not have her teeth modified for a few years and was once thrown out of a media interview for calling a DJ “small-penised” after he referred to her as “snaggle-toothed”. She does have a set of teeth that are a bit out of place, and crowded around the front, but I haven’t met too many dudes who would kick Jewel out of bed.
2. Anthony Davis
Teeth are by no means a prerequisite to be a professional athlete. Hockey players seldom have a full set, and quite a few football players have made amazing careers for themselves with very few; check out Jack Lambert, one of the greatest linebackers of all time, he had barely any teeth in his mouth. The same cannot be said of the New Orleans Pelicans’ center.
Anthony Davis is one of those unique looking individuals in the NBA. He has a prominent unibrow but his teeth are just as remarkable. He looks like he has all of them, but it is hard to tell if any of them are in the right place. The bottom of his jaw looks like that of a Star Wars character. The basketball skill is unquestionable, but unfortunately so is the statement: “nope, he’s never even met a dentist”.
1. Shane MacGowan
If you’re not an aficionado of Irish-English punk, then the name Shane MacGowan and The Pogues may not be familiar. But I basically just told you all you needed to know. MacGowan is the frontman of the band, who have been recording and performing on and off since the early 1980s. He wouldn’t be much of a punk rocker without a vice or two, and in his case, poor oral hygiene was compounded by alcohol abuse along with decades of drug abuse (particularly heroin) and resulted in him losing all his teeth by the late 2000s. Just last year he finally got his mouth worked on and got a full set of new dentures; and of course one gold tooth.
A brief Google search however, provides more than enough photographic evidence for why people should not use drugs to excess. From the 1970s, Shane MacGowan’s teeth got worse and worse until he just had a mouthful of gums in 2008.
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