In some cases a director actually does set out to make a bad movie. Studios like Troma have made a name by making intentionally bad films on shoe-string budgets. Sometimes this really works. The first Toxic Avenger film is considered a classic by many. These instances are few and far between unfortunately. Most of the time when a director makes a movie they have no idea what they’re unleashing on the world. They might figure it out when they’re watching the final product, but it’s nicer to think that no one is intentionally releasing this kind of work. It would take one twisted individual (or perhaps an evil genius!) to intentionally create any of these ten films.
10. House of the Dead – IMDb Score: 2.0
If a movie has director Uwe Boll’s name attached you and can be guaranteed three things:
First, it’s more than likely going to be based on a video game. Second, it will have absolutely nothing to do with that video game. Literally. The only similarity will be in name only. Third, it will be terrible. Boll is so well known for making bad movies that he’s even challenged all his harshest critics to a boxing match. To his credit, he won all the matches. Unfortunately this didn’t make films like House of the Dead any better. This zombie film had nothing going for it. It didn’t feature any characters from the game and the only thing it shared with the game were the zombies.
9. Space Mutiny (or Mutiny in Space) – IMDb Score: 2.0
This film actually falls under the “so bad it’s good” category. It’s pretty bad but it never appears to take itself seriously. The costumes are absolutely ridiculous and the haircuts are just astonishingly bad. You’d be hard pressed to find anyone else that believed this is what people would dress like in the future.
The entire movie takes place on a space ship that you have to imagine was destroyed after the credits. They used so many flame throwers and blew up flammable gas on so many occasions it’s amazing the thing hadn’t burnt to a crisp by the end of the film. It also appears that the space ship interior was possibly an oil refinery the director’s friend let him use as a set.
8. Invasion of the Neptune Men – IMDb Score: 2.0
This Japanese film about a group of kids that find a rocket ship full of malicious Neptunians is another film that’s so bad it’s good. The voices used to dub the children are absolutely hilarious. The movie has nearly everything wrong with it. First, there is absolutely no explanation to the hero of the film, Space Chief. Space Chief is an earthbound scientist who just so happens to have a flying car and space age laser weapons. His origins or ability to invent the technology is never brought up. The kids constantly shame and laugh at the only female in the entire cast and they seem to be able to walk in and out of a military base with reckless abandon. When Mystery Science Theater 3000 lampooned the film they even point this out by saying, “So these kids have level 5 security clearance?” The grand finale of the film is a rocket ship battle that goes on, and on, and on…
7. Manos: The Hands of Fate – IMDb Score: 1.9
“There is no way out of here…it’ll be dark soon. There is no way out of here.”
These lines uttered by the satyr character of Torgo sum up exactly how one might feel as the film goes on. Things get dark and eventually you’ll wish there was a way out.
Manos: The Hands of Fate is a film about a family that gets lost on vacation. They are given every reason to not stay at the house and are even told by Torgo that “The Master wouldn’t like it.” The father of the family, an idiot by the name of Mike, insists that Torgo let them stay anyway and pretty much moves his family right in against the owners wishes.
Manos is probably the most famous bad film on the list. It’s badness has even been mentioned in How I Met Your Mother. The film was made by a fertilizer salesman that insisted he could make an entire movie by himself. He won the bet as the film actually being good was never a stipulation.
6. Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2 – IMDb Score: 1.9
It was the sequel that nobody asked for. The first film in the Baby Geniuses movie franchise had an IMDb rating of only 2.4 and a Rotten Tomatoes rating of 2% rotten. Unfortunately, the idea of cute kids talking generally sells and enough people saw the darn thing that the studio made money. So long as a studio makes money the odds are good that a sequel will follow, even if it is in hopes that the audience might be bamboozled by the idea of cute kids again.
Aside from the fact that the film relies on bad jokes and puns that are only supposed to be funny because babies are saying them, there is a very disturbing plot-point of the lead baby actually being an adult stuck in a child’s body.
5. Going Overboard – IMDb Score: 1.9
This film about a comedian hoping to make it big in the world of the cruise ship comedy circuit really didn’t have much of a chance. First off, it starred a pre-Saturday Night Live Adam Sandler that often breaks the fourth wall and addresses the viewer. He makes it clear he is fully aware that he is in what he calls a “no-budget” film. You start to feel like this idea was added in later when the crew of the film just decided to give up.
The entire film was shot on a cruise ship that was actually on a cruise with paying customers. The director, who judging by the film is very obviously not a genius, forgot to bring the proper lenses and the entire film was shot with the wrong camera lenses.
If you want a copy to see for yourself (not recommended) they are practically giving it away on Amazon with additional buying options starting at a penny!
4. Final Justice – IMDb Score: 1.9
Joe Don Baker is rather well-known for being in sub-par films (Mystery Science Theater 3000 has lampooned a number of them) and this one about a Texas lawman is just one of a long line of films where Baker plays an authority figure that “doesn’t play by the rules.” Seriously, in his film Mitchell, Baker plays a cop that abuses alcohol and sleeps with prostitutes. In the film Walking Tall (remade with Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson for whatever reason) Baker plays a sheriff that beats criminals with a 2×4. Now here in Final Justice we have Baker playing a lawman who after constantly being told to not go after a criminal by police, he does anyway. Several times. Over and over and over again…and then once more for good measure.
3. Birdemic: Shock and Terror – IMDb Score: 1.9
This one is a little surprising to see ranked so low. Birdemic is exactly what it sounds like; a bunch of killer birds killing people. Birdemic is one of those films that isn’t taking itself very seriously. It knows exactly what it is and the actors in the film are all but winking at the camera in most scenes. If the makers of Birdemic were out to make cinematic gold one would imagine they’d use more than $10,000 to make a film in 2010. This film appears to be “all in good fun” but regardless, it’s still one of the lowest ranked films on IMDb, period.
2. Disaster Movie – IMDb Score: 1.9
Seriously, the American government needs to step-in and do something about writers/directors Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer. Their special brand of parody films that aren’t actually parody films are getting too numerous and far out of hand. They always name the films after the types of movies they parody but then they really just make a lot of bad jokes about the years current pop-culture, as if to say, “Hey! Remember this? From earlier in the year? We do too!” They aren’t even really jokes so much as re-enactments.
One also has to ask the question, “How does it take two directors to make movies this bad?”
Unfortunately, twelve year old males love this stuff. This means every year we’ll probably see a “______ Movie” movie.
1. The Hottie and the Nottie – IMDb Score: 1.8
This film grossed less than $30,000 in the United States. Does anyone realize how hard it is to only gross $30,000? This means you could very well meet and shake hands with everyone in the United States that went to see this movies in theaters and you could probably do it in less than a day.
This film is an extremely tired one about inner beauty starring Paris Hitlon who uses her screen time to show the world she is definitely not an actress. More importantly, why does Hollywood keep thinking we don’t know by now that less attractive people could (gasp!) be nice!
The film used make-up and facial prosthesis to make one of the most ridiculous things ever caught on film. Oh well. That’s better than the old film trope where glasses and a pony-tail equaled ugly.