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The 10 Worst Ever Celebrity Christmas Songs

Entertainment
The 10 Worst Ever Celebrity Christmas Songs

We all know that the majority of celebrities have substantial egos. That isn’t necessarily a bad thing. A huge ego can actually be helpful in propelling a star to superstar status.

But from time to time, a celebrity’s sense of self can become so inflated, that they enter into a media category that is not their strength. For example, some actors, reality stars and athletes attempt to add singing to their repertoire and the result can be more embarrassing than professional.

And during the holiday season, many icons cannot resist entering into the musical arena with a sentimental or bizarre twist on our holiday favorites.

Sometimes you just have to learn the hard way.

10. Duck Dynasty

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What could say Christmas better than a bunch of bearded men from a hit television show? During the height of its popularity, A&E solicited the stars of Duck Dynasty to cash in on their show’s popularity with a Christmas album. The release of Duck the Halls, A Robertson Family Christmas coincided with their TV special.

Willie Robertson, Uncle Si, Phil Robertson and the rest of the clan clearly are not singers, and their show has nothing to do with music. So in order to lend a drop of credibility to the CD, the producers recruited actual country stars to sing on the record, including George Strait, Luke Bryan, Alison Krauss and Josh Turner. They also hired songwriters to write four original “Duck Dynasty Holiday Songs” including “Ragin’ Cajun Redneck Christmas” and “Hairy Christmas.”

Christmas and duck calls now go hand in hand.


9. Kristen Bell

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Perhaps best known for her television role as Veronica Mars, many fans were surprised to find out that Kristen Bell has a strong background in music, including a role in a 2001 Broadway musical.

Perhaps most impressively, Kristen did all the singing for the character of Anna in the Oscar winning film Frozen. Unfortunately, her glorious singing voice could not offset the ludicrous lyrics of the 2014 festive release “Text Me a Merry Christmas.”

The actress and singer paired up with the a cappella group Straight No Chaser for the holiday single that pays respect to today’s world where everyone is glued to cell phones. The lyrics poke fun at how much we all rely on texting to communicate. The song includes the following lines:

“Text me Merry Christmas / Let me know you care / Just a word or two / Of text from you / Will remind me you’re still there.”

You don’t have to add much to it / One smiley face will do / Baby text me Merry Christmas / ‘Cause I’m missing kissing you.”

Although Kristen’s voice is inspiring, it is clear that she recorded the lyrics with her tongue firmly in her cheek.


8. The Ramones

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A majority of readers may not recognize the name of the mid 1970’s American punk rock band, The Ramones. They were considered to be forerunners in the punk music genre. Although their songs may not have topped the charts when they were released, The Ramones were definitely a major influence on the punk rock movement as it progressed.

The four original band members adopted stage names ending with the last name “Ramone”, although none of them were actually related to each other.

In the late 1980’s, The Ramones were a key part of a bizarre holiday song entitled Merry Christmas (I Don’t Want To Fight Tonight). This holiday single failed to even chart, but fans of these punk pioneers heap heavy praises on this 17 year old release that includes the lyrics:

Merry Christmas, I don’t want to fight tonight
Merry Christmas, I don’t want to fight tonight
Merry Christmas, I don’t want to fight tonight with you

Where is Santa? At his sleigh?
Tell me why is it always this way?
Where is Rudolph? Where is Blitzen, baby?
Merry Christmas, merry merry merry Christmas

All the children are tucked in their beds
Sugar-plum fairies dancing in their heads
Snowball fighting, it’s so exciting baby

7. Phil Spector

via mashable.com

via mashable.com

Today’s generation most likely relates the name Phil Spector to the 2009 murder trial in the death of actress Lana Clarkson.

But to an older age bracket, Phil Spector was a leading record producer and songwriter, with more than twenty-five Top 40 hits from 1960 to 1965.

Phil released a classic Christmas album November 22, 1963, the same day as the assassination of President John F. Kennedy. At the time A Christmas Gift for You was a relative failure as the country was immersed in other serious issues.

However, like many films, songs and television specials, in subsequent years the album grew in popularity and is now considered to be a holiday classic. Several of its tracks became iconic Christmas songs for generations.

Unfortunately, Phil Spector will only be able to listen to his songs from prison. He was convicted of second-degree murder and is serving a prison sentence of 19 years to life.

6. “Ally McBeal”

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The star of this fashionable television series simply called Ally McBeal was Calista Flockhart. During her career, she has received a Golden Globe Award, a Screen Actors Guild Award and three Emmy Award nominations. She also won the heart of Harrison Ford of Star Wars and Indiana Jones fame. The two were married in 2010.

In 2000, Calista branched out and was featured on a holiday album simply titled Ally McBeal: A Very Ally Christmas. It included 14 tracks of the season’s favorite hymns and carols.

Some critics enjoyed Flockhart’s silly, sassy, soulful and seductive tone. But many of her fans encouraged her to “focus on her day job.” These groupies may have been right… Ally McBeal ran for six seasons and over a hundred episodes.

5. Snoop Dogg

via missinfo.tv

via missinfo.tv

If hip hop is your preferred music style, Snoop Dogg may have exactly what you need.

Born Calvin Cordozar Broadus, Jr., Snoop has sold over 30 million albums worldwide. His music career began in 1992 when he was discovered by Dr. Dre, another hip hop legend.

So if your idea of a festive party includes the beat of hip hop music, then Snoop Dogg’s 2008 Christmas album Christmas in tha Dogg House could be the perfect soundtrack to help you celebrate the holiday. The weed-loving superstar has been part of several holiday songs, but this album features “explicit” compositions, including A Pimp’s Christmas Song. This one-of-a-kind collection was a compilation album that was sold digital only.

4. Olivia Newton and John Travolta

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Many fans anticipated this long-awaited musical reunion of Grease superstars with the 2012 release of the album, This Christmas. It marked almost 35 years since the two idols joined forces on a new musical venture.

This Christmas received mixed reviews. Some commented that this group of songs by Olivia and John took “tacky to previously unimagined heights.” Perhaps the album was saved in part by several guest appearances including Barbra Streisand, James Taylor, Tony Bennett and Kenny G.

3. Kathie Lee Gifford

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Kathie Lee’s 1993 Christmas album isn’t terrible, but it is what you’d expect from morning television’s wine guzzling and often confused hostess. The compilation of songs includes a guest appearance of former co-host Regis Philbin.

Not everyone loves Kathie Lee Gifford’s style. Even her peers are not always fans of her performances. She has received 11 Daytime Emmy nominations, but didn’t win her first Daytime Emmy until 2010 as part of the Today team.


2. RuPaul

via spotlight-christmas.blogspot.com

via spotlight-christmas.blogspot.com

America’s favorite drag queen, RuPaul released Ho, Ho, Ho in 1997, an extremely unusual album of Christmas music.

This melodic assortment was an unconventional combination of original music and comedic sketches. Even the album title is a double entendre… The cover featured three scantily-clad versions of RuPaul, and the back cover featured her legs with panties around the ankles; these are the “three ho’s”.

Much of the humor on the album is of a risqué nature, making it one of the less wholesome holiday albums. For example the classic “All I Want For Christmas” is turned into a thumping dance party chorus with lyrical changes referring to breast implants, a tummy tuck and a nose job.

The lyrics of “I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus” were also modified to “I Saw Daddy Kissing Santa Claus.”

1. David Hasselhoff

via zeleb.es

via zeleb.es

No celebrity list of actors trying to turn vocalists would be complete without David Hasselhoff. And nothing says Merry Christmas like listening to David Hasselhoff singing classic Christmas songs.

The Hoff was originally best known as a television actor with leading roles in Knight Rider and Baywatch.   When the series ended, Hasselhoff crossed over to a music career during the 1980s and the early 1990s. He famed exploded in Europe (specifically Germany), but not so much in the U.S. where he was more of a caricature than a serious vocalist.

David experienced serious addiction issues as well. In 2007, a home video clip surfaced of Hasselhoff apparently in an alcoholic stupor, shirtless and drunk, lying on the floor, trying to eat a cheeseburger in a Las Vegas hotel room.

But as he has done before, David Hasselhoff bounced back and as recently as 2010 appeared on Dancing with the Stars and was a judge on America’s Got Talent. And his holiday album is still available for purchase on Amazon.com.

 

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