One of the questions most people ask dating/relationship experts and ask themselves is, “How do we know if we are good in bed?”
There really is no test you can take. If there are quizzes in magazines, how many people are really honest when taking them? It is also true that we spend our time before hooking up, calculating everything he/she does to decide wether they will be good in bed. From the way they walk and talk, to the way they speak to us, every moment is a deciding factor in reassuring us that they will be great in the sack.
So thinking about this question, how would anyone really know if their partner is good or not? And really, how can anyone not be good at something that we all were “made” to do in order to recreate? Here are ten signs that he will be great in bed or the reasons why he is satisfying you to no end.
10. He Or She Doesn’t Brag
If a guy goes around bragging about past flings, chances are this person isn’t really great in bed. It’s those who constantly brag about how awesome they are between the sheets, that really are bad in bed. It’s a fact, all women are different and all want different things in bed. Guys don’t automatically know what each individual person wants. You have to communicate to them to do what you actually like, rather than what their last girlfriend partner. As noted in Men’s Health magazine, the men who brag are the ones who need validation that they are indeed “good in bed.”
9. He Makes You Feel Sexy
When you date someone who makes you feel this way, you are never self-conscious, which during sex is huge. It’s not our physical appearance, but it’s the way we feel about our body that will bring the quality to our sex lives. You don’t need sexy lingerie to make the sex great. According to Cosmopolitan magazine, research shows we don’t really fall in love with a person but we fall in love with how we feel when we are with them. This is why we really don’t “fall out of love,” either, we just don’t enjoy how our partner makes us feel anymore. So you want your relationship to last and you want great sex, keep complimenting your partner and paying attention to the small details, and you won’t be disappointed.
8. Are They Skilled With Their Hands?
There’s a lot to be said in the way someone uses their hands. According to Men’s Health magazine, hands can add so much creativity to sex. Your hands are sensitive and capable of giving your partner intense pleasure and powerful climaxes. Those who use their hands for a living, whether it be a musician, artist, athlete, to name a few, have a hand up on being great in bed. But you too can be great in bed if you can use your hands to stimulate your partner’s desire before sex. Massage is the ultimate way to do this. To give your partner a massage, according to Men’s Health, you will need to use your entire hand: fingers and palm, heel and fingertips.
7. Takes Chances
If they enjoy trying new things or taking risks, chances are they will also take risks in the bedroom. But if you are with a person who doesn’t take as many risks as you or enjoys different adventures as you, you may not want to spring a new move on your partner without communicating with them first. On the other hand, if you both enjoy taking risks, (not risks that are going to cause you injury) and enjoy the same type of adventures, then the new moves or ideas you bring into the bedroom are going to work and succeed.
Here’s the kicker: according to Men’s Fitness magazine, there are 10 really adventurous moves you can try in bed, that will not only get her motor running, but leave you wanting more. One of them, which is called, ” The Bent Spoon” that is a new spin on spooning that most couples haven’t tried. You don’t have to be willing to swing from trees, but you should have that feeling of ”why not?’
6. He Isn’t Selfish
Sex is a two-way street, therefore if you date someone who is always about them, when you get to the bedroom, that is the ONLY person they will be thinking about: Themselves. Practicing compassion in every area of your life is important, but practicing it in the bedroom can make you really great in bed. I’m not suggesting you always put the other person first, but it can be an ego booster to satisfy your partner instead of always hoping that your partner will satisfy you. It’s about treating your partner how you’d like to be treated.
5. His Walk
The better the posture, the more confident he is, which means the better he is in the bedroom. When you have a good posture, it helps to make you feel better about yourself without even doing anything else different. Having good posture can also improve your mood. When you are in a great mood, you will be more willing to take chances, feel sexier, and overall feel more self-assured in all areas of your life; including your sex life. According to The Science Of Posture, our body language is closely related to our posture and how others see us. So stand up straight, don’t slouch, and walk with a little life in your step. The more you do these things, the better your sex life will be.
4. He Is Actually Interested In How Your Day Was
If they are asking a lot of probing questions about you, they are trying to find out what makes you happy. Think about it, what is the best way to really get to know someone? The best way is to learn what they do and what they like to do. And how do you do that? By asking a lot of questions and hanging out with them in real time. You don’t need to be a social butterfly either, all you need to do is keep conversations going by being an active listener and showing good posture (body language) that means you are interested in him. Don’t ask questions that require one word answers. Instead ask questions like, “What are you planning to do this weekend?” This will help you get to know your partner and it also signifies that you wish to make them happy.
3. Seriously, Just Let Go
You really aren’t getting anything out of sex, if you are constantly holding back. According to Cosmopolitan magazine, if you’re constantly thinking about if you are doing it right, how you look, are you too quiet, should I talk dirty, and so forth, then you never will totally be in that moment and chances are both of you won’t be fully enjoying yourselves. If you want that unbelievable, mind -blowing moment, then you need to act freely, not constricted in bed. Turn down the lights so you’re not as body-conscious, turn the phone off to avoid interruption, do whatever you need to do in order to be the moment. And remember, don’t fake it. Faking that you are enjoying yourself when you aren’t, will actually be putting more pressure on you the next time and things could get awkward.
2. Kissing Style
You can tell if your partner is great in bed by the way they kiss. A good kiss is one that is soft and gentle yet firm and passionate. You want something that ignites the spark in the bedroom. Kissing is the start to seduction. The secret to a woman’s passionate self starts with the kiss. According to iVillage, the kiss is a good indicator of chemistry and lovemaking style. Good kisses don’t follow a formula; they just happen. But in the act of each kiss, we send dozens of signs, alerting the person to either pull back or keep kissing. This is what you not only learn from experiences, but you just instinctively just do it.
1. Work It
If they workout they are not only able to keep up but the saying, “all night long” means something to them. Researchers know that being physically fit and active is a big boost for women, but it can also make you better in bed. For instance, exercise boosts your libido, enhances your endurance, and helps you gain confidence. Exercising is a great motivation to be better in bed. Now, before you decide to go join a gym, there are many exercises you can do at home that will not only keep you fit, but also help you become a sex goddess. Concentrate on your abs, which is the body part that is associated with stamina and performance, according to Men’s Health. And you can do many of the exercises right in the comfort of your own home.