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Look, I get it - it’s hard to be a man in modern society. All that male privilege and expectation can make even a slight setback into a devastating blow to the old self-esteem. 

It can be tough to get over yourself. Luckily, we have r/niceguys, the Reddit sub where people post examples of guys who try to be nice but wind up being misogynistic jerk-wads just as soon as the object of their affection turns out to have a mind of her own.

There are some pretty harrowing tales to be found on r/niceguys, and we’ve pulled out the very best for your enjoyment. And if you think you might be a nice guy, maybe you’ll learn something from these sterling examples and get some serious help.

WARNING: Some of these stories have some vulgar language or trigger words.

RELATED: THINGS MEN DO THAT WOMEN FIND CREEPY

Man Falls In Love With Stripper

The first of our stories come from Reddit user Beebopalooba, and like most good stories it begins in a strip club. Our nice guy had been mounting a constitutional challenge in Utah to legalize brothels and wound up at a strip club to perform some "legal research". 

But along the way, he found love. A stripper caught his eye and he was immediately smitten. He went home, got on Facebook and professed his love, saying he’d show up again with suit and tie and a bouquet of flowers to sweep the lovely lady off her feet.

So she blocked him.

The resulting Facebook meltdown from our nice guy had both legal and death threats to the point where he was eventually proposing a law that would make it illegal for girls to turn him down.

For those that missed this epic nice guy melt down last night, here it is, fully redacted with all names removed, perfectly preserved for posterity... from niceguys

A Woman Being A Man’s Friend Is Killing Him Slowly

If there was ever a single Twitter post to make you cringe, it’s this one. From Reddit user 20friedpickles comes this post from an obvious nice guy trying to convince the world that sleeping with him is the only way for women to truly “accept” him.

Our story begins with one woman lamenting how creepy it is for male friends to think they’re owed sex, and shortly after comes this gem of a comment:

"Owe Them? No. It is pure hope. It is a flame, that you keep alive by every flick of the hair, every quirky smile meant for him, every brush of the hand, every butt on his body movement. You are using him, killing him slowly, by telling him you accept him, but never accepting him completely."

Yeesh.

Girls are slowly killing guys by being their friend. from niceguys

The Truth About The Friend Zone

The dreaded “friend zone” is something that most guys complain about sooner or later, as though having a female friend is something to complain about. Reddit user tsume24 provides us with a Facebook post that does a fantastic job of explaining the friend zone via the metaphor of applying for a job.

Our niceguy Tweeted that being in the friend zone is a lot like being turned down for a job and then being complained to about the guy that was actually hired. His response was somewhat more enlightened:

"The friend zone is basically when someone turns you down for a job and then start hanging around in the lobby in case they fire the guy so you can be first in line for another interview. Meanwhile, the guy who interviewed you sees you there, and you say 'hi' and lie about why you're there, so you start chatting him up every time he passes by so he's convinced you're friends."

Dropping an atomic truth bomb on a NiceGuy™ from niceguys

RELATED: HOW TO ESCAPE THE FRIENDZONE

Respecting Women Is Not The Same As Being A Virgin

This piece of advice comes from user visionarygirl, who found this delightful nice guy on Facebook. It features what is presumably the poster’s face followed by the caption, “Yes, I'm a proud virgin! Because unlike you sexually activated savages, I actually respect women!”

Of course, it bears mentioning that refraining from sex is not the same as respecting women. You can engage in coitus respectably with anyone, while those that abstain can still be total jerks. In fact, we find the abstainers to more often be the ones who are lacking in respect. After all, how can you show consideration without being around someone to be considerate to?

The face of this sub from niceguys

RELATED: STUBBORN MYTHS ABOUT VIRGINS

Breaking And Entering Is Romance, Right?

This classic tale comes from Reddit user je_suis_un_negre about a nice guy who decides to break into a woman’s house late at night to give her flowers. Apparently, this nice guy got all his dating tips from bad romantic comedies.

Rather than accepting her knight in shining armor to her waiting bosom, she does what any sensible person would do and calls the cops. Our nice guy manages to escape before the fuzz arrives, and then immediately launches into a Facebook soliloquy about how romance is dead.

Word of advice to guys - movies are not dating manuals.

Nice guy attempts to justify breaking and entering to woo his fair maiden from niceguys

RELATED: MAN TRIES TO BREAK INTO CRUSH'S HOUSE, GETS BLASTED ON FACEBOOK

Never Give Out A Friend’s Number Without Consulting Her First

From Reddit user ostulus comes this quick story of a nice guy from math class with an ego so fragile you'd think it was made of toilet paper.

Rather than go directly to the object of his affection, he decided to go in through the back door and ask her friend for her number. Her friend was obviously young, naive, or both, since she decided to give it out without first consulting her bestie. Niceguy decides to text her later, gets shot down, and immediately launches into a tirade which culminates in him threatening suicide since he can’t endure the rejection. A tragedy worthy of Shakespeare.

Moral of the story: always ask before you give out your friend’s number.

Nice guy from my friend's math class from niceguys

When A Friend Crosses The Line Into Becoming A Niceguy

It can be a terrible thing when you find out one of your best friends is a nice guy. Reddit user riccarjo found out one day after a male bestie said that he couldn’t figure out why he can’t get any girls. Riccarjo suggested that it may be the desperation of his search, and the fact that his goal to simply “find a woman” objectifies them in the extreme, and may be holding him back. HT he responded by attacking all women and saying he will probably die alone.

Some men are simply beyond saving.

Unfortunately one of my best friends is officially a "nice guy". He's been on the edge for years but today he officially crossed the threshold. from niceguys

If You’re A Niceguy, Beware Of Facebook

One of the top-rated posts on the front page of the internet has been posted by an account that has since been deleted, but not before giving us what is titled “Facebook Gold”.

Nice guys typically out themselves on social media with vague lamentations on why women don’t find them attractive and how they always wind up with classless dolts. Only this time his complaint was met by a real world acquaintance who knew where his online musings were coming from.

Apparently, he’d already complained to a compatriot how he wasn’t even being noticed by the girl du jour, and this caused said friend to lay down some harsh truths saying he’d never even talked to her, and on top of that, only ever discussed her with said friend in the crudest ways possible. Then, those private WhatsApp conversations got out, and the world knew for sure that this was a certifiable nice guy.

Facebook Gold: The outing of a 'nice guy' from niceguys

Coming On Too Strong

By way of Reddit user Thunderuss comes this story of what happens to a nice guy that comes on a little too strong and then gets butthurt for being shot down.

Our nice guy hero opens up with a “hi”, then follows up with two apologies for messaging, a Spider-Man reference, a request for long-term commitment, and two dog and cat emojis. When he gets let down easy with a response of “Sorry, I have a really awesome boyfriend actually,” he comes back with, “Don’t gotta rub it in,” before calling her a c-word.

It’s amazing how men can come on strong enough to move a mountain, but then can’t take a tiny “no”.

Stolen from r/cringepics from niceguys

Not Everyone Is Free To Chat

User rrns has this piece of Reddit gold from a brief text conversation with a nice guy so up his own butt he couldn’t take a simple “no, I’m studying” as an answer.

First, he decides to text our fair lady out of the blue without even bothering to introduce himself, and then when she responds that she’s studying for midterms and can’t really chat he tells her to kill herself while saying he’s a nice guy and she’s the one missing out.

It gets better. She replies with, “Really? because my idea of a nice guy is someone who can take 'no' for an answer,” the nice guy comes back to say his phone was taken by a friend and it wasn’t really him uttering death threats.

Nice try, nice guy. Nice try.

The Nice Guy that Got Away from niceguys