Have you noticed how some people just seem to get all the breaks? If you dismiss this phenomenon as being purely down to luck, you are going to miss out on some vital information that could allow you to enjoy a similar level of success. The reality is these high-achievers are more likely to attract exciting opportunities, as well as meet the useful business contacts, due to their winning attitude.
“Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference.”
Attitude can be defined as the way you think and feel about people, events, places, and things, and it can be positive, negative, or neutral. You develop this response due to previous experiences, but it becomes so ingrained that your reaction occurs subconsciously. For example, if you had a particularly bad experience during a trip to Florida, it may impact your attitude towards any mention of this state in the future.
Your attitudes are not static, and you can take deliberate steps to change them. When you were a young child, you may have had a negative attitude towards vegetables, but you later were able to develop an appreciation for this important source of nutrition.
How A Bad Attitude Can Hold You Back
“Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude.”
If you have the wrong attitude, it can harm your relationships and make it harder for you to achieve your goals. A good example of this would be demand resistance. This is where your automatic response to any attempt to tell you what to do is to do the opposite, so if your boss tells you to come in early the next day, you deliberately arrive late. It is believed this attitude develops in childhood due to unrealistic expectations from parents – the young person copes by rebelling against all demands.
There are many types of attitude that can hold you back in life, and the most common of these would include:
•Automatically assuming the worst of people
•‘Schadenfruede’ means getting enjoyment from watching other people fail
•Jumping to conclusions
•Black and white thinking – this would mean you see everything in terms of ‘good’ and ‘bad’ or ‘right’ or ‘wrong’
•An ‘all or nothing’ approach to life
•Over-generalization is where you allow one bad experience to determine your future reaction to similar experiences (e.g. I once got food poisoning from an Italian restaurant, so I’ll never eat Italian food again)
•Exaggerating the negative in life
•Cynicism towards new or different ideas
•Automatically dismissing anything that conflicts with your current beliefs or ideas
If you develop a reputation for having a ‘bad attitude’, it is going to make it harder for you to build friendships. It can also mean that your name won’t be considered when new opportunities arise – “Don’t ask her, she’ll just complain all the time and make everyone miserable”.
One of the other important ways your attitude impacts your fortunes in life is the effect it has on motivation. If you have a tendency towards negativity, it is going to be a drain on your mental energy. It also means you are less likely to leave your comfort zone because you don’t expect this hard work to be enough to get you to your goals. This negative attitude can lead to a self-fulfilling prophecy where the act of predicting failure actually sets in motion the factors that lead to this failure (e.g. if people expect to fail an exam, they are going to be less motivated to study).
Many of the people who complain about their bad luck in life are actually reaping the results of a bad attitude. The problem is these individuals may be completely unaware that there is anything wrong with the way they react to life. It takes a lot of guts for people to be willing to objectively and honestly assess their own attitudes for any signs of trouble but developing this type of insight can be vital.
How The Right Attitude Could Make You Rich
“A positive attitude causes a chain reaction of positive thoughts, events and outcomes. It is a catalyst and it sparks extraordinary results.”
Developing the right attitude is where you start to think and behave in a way that is going to benefit your life. It doesn’t mean you are always super-positive and bursting with energy – it’s more about the general way you deal with things (you are still allowed to have bad days). If you want to develop an attitude that is most likely to lead you to riches, you need to consider the responses to life that are most likely to make this happen.
If you have a reputation for being someone who is easy to work with, and who is highly motivated, it is going to make you a more obvious choice when opportunities become available. Your positive attitude means you stand out from the crowd, and your likability is going to win you allies who want to see you do well.
By deliberately cultivating a positive attitude, it means you are highly-motivated to succeed, and you are also going to be better able to deal with failure. It may look to some other people that you are just lucky, but your positivity and tenacity means you are there waiting and ready when the opportunities arise. The fact you have become a ‘can-do’ person means you are not afraid to take chances and take on projects that are going to involve a huge commitment.
How To Develop A Winning Attitude
One of the biggest hurdles to developing a winning attitude is the excuse “It’s just the way I am.” If you believe your attitudes are somehow an unchangeable aspect of your personality, you are not going to have the motivation to change them. This is why it is important for you to think back to see how your beliefs and reactions towards things have changed over time. You need to see how attitudes are just a learned way of reacting to the world, and therefore something you can unlearn.
A key element of a winning attitude is for you to develop a more positive outlook on life. This means you need to stop focusing so much on the negative, and the reasons for why you can’t achieve your dreams – remember, successful people have all the same reasons for failure as those who never achieve much. You need to get into the habit of telling yourself ‘yes – I can do this’ – even if it means that you ‘fake it to make it’ in the beginning.
If you have goals that you feel passionate about, it is going to be easier for you to develop a winning attitude. Some people behave negatively because they are doing something they don’t enjoy. If your job is making you miserable, you need to look for something better or find a way to like it more. Once you become excited about what you are doing, all the other ingredients of a successful attitude usually fall into place.
One of the other ways you can develop a winning attitude is to have the right role models. There is a theory that we become the average of the five people we spend most of our time with, so if you hang around negative people, this is likely to influence your own attitude. Even if you are not on friendly terms with many successful people, you can read about these individuals in books or even be inspired by watching their speeches on YouTube.